Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Dear Baby

I can tell you are different from you older brother already and you aren't even here yet. I hope I don't compare you too much. You are flipping all over the place, and that type of movement is so new to me. You seem to like being breech some too as I've been feeling hiccups up high a bunch. I wonder if you will like upside down as much as your brother. You don't seem to like it very much now. And your brother still likes it. I still hope you will settle head down; at least for birth. I'm really nervous about being a mom again. I hope I love you as much as I love your older brother. Because I sure love him a bunch. It's hard to imagine I didn't even know him a short two years ago. I can't wait to see what you are like and get to know you better.



3 Men, 2 Ladies and a Hound said...

It is pretty amazing how your heart grows with the birth of the second child and how at one moment you don't know how it is possible to love two equally and then you can't remember ever loving both any less.

I can't wait for you to experience that love!!! You are a great mom and two lucky babies are so blessed to have you as their mommy!

~Lydia~ said...

Thank you Sharon I appreciate that. It's one of the things I've been most insecure about this whole pregnancy, even from when I found out I was first pregnant.

Ladyornot.com said...

You are a great mom. The love you have for Tommy just will double in size. He won't loose any space. The circumference of your love just gets bigger.

Remember how the love you felt for Tommy was a love that you never felt before. This will happen again. :)

You may compare your children. It is so bad, as long as you are not making negative comparisons.

Its fun when each child is unique. One might be great at writing and on at sports. Neither is a better skill but it is cool to see their differences.

I can't wait to meet your new child. I am sure she/he will be a wonderful little person.

Mother of a "Special" Child

When I was young, I'd often say,
I'd like to be a mom someday
While playing with my baby doll,
I thought that job's not hard at all

I'd have a baby, maybe two,
a girl in pink...a boy in blue
Well I grew up and sure enough,
I'm now a mom and gosh it's tough

The baby that was sent to me,
was born with disabilities
At first I'm frightened through and through,
there's much to learn to care for you

This wasn't in my plans at all,
when I was young and played with dolls
Your mind and body were so weak,
you might not ever walk or speak

So much special care required,
I'm often scared and often tired
As months and years go slowly by,
I smile a lot but sometimes cry

To watch you grow and not complain,
though you endure your share of pain
Oh, how I'd hold you and I'd pray,
that you'd be healed and whole someday

But I knew that was not to be,
not physically or mentally
And so I taught you best I could,
your progress wasn't very good

But then one day I realized,
as I gazed into your loving eyes
That I had learned so much from you,
determination...courage too

A love so unconditional,
it floods my soul and always will
I'm proud to say I gave you birth,
for you're an angel here on earth.

God Choose a mother for a "Special" child

Most women becaome mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressure and a couple by habit.

This year nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children. Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen?

Somehow I visualize God hovering over earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As He observes, He instructs His angels to make notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth; son. Patron saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."

"Forrest, Marjotie; daughter. Patron saint, Cecelia."

"Rutledge, Carrie; twins. Patron saint, Matthew."

Finally He passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."

The angel is curious. "Why this one God? She's so happy."

"Exactly," smiles God, "Could I give a handicapped child to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."

"But she has patience?" asked the angel.

"I don't want her to have to much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll handle it."

"I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I'm going to give her has his own world. She has to make her live in her world and that's not going to be easy."

"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you." God smiles, "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect - she has just enough selfishness." The angel gasps - "selfishness? is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a 'spoken word'. She will never consider a 'step' ordinary. When her child says 'Momma' for the first time, she will be present at a miracle, and will know it!"

"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see...ignorance, cruelty, prejudice....and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life, because she is doing My work as surely as if she is here by My side".

And what about her Patron saint? asked the angel, his pen poised in mid-air.

God smiles, "A mirror will suffice."